Astarion Ancunín

Okay.

[ A breath out. ]

I got a couple of presents for you at port. Because I want you to feel comfortable, I'm going to let you approach me when you're ready to-

Well, anything.

By communicator. By mind. Walking up to me. Whatever. Short of needing to let you know something, I'll give you some space to cool off. If something happens where I'm concerned about you specifically, I'll contact you here and I'd appreciate a check back, but that'll be the end of it. It won't... turn into a big long talk like this did.

I mean, unless you want it to. But-

You get what I'm saying, I hope.

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Yes. I get what you're saying. Thank you.

From:

Good.

[ He breathes out... and then realizes one last thing.]

One last thing before I forget: Arthur knows I was shaken up by touching a corpse. I didn't tell him anything, but he's not stupid and there aren't many things I won't talk to him about. I'm going to keep an eye on him so hopefully he doesn't bother you about but I figured I'd give you the heads up just in case. I told him to stop meddling but...

[ Arthur Lester cannot be governed. ]

Edited Date: 2024-05-26 06:02 pm (UTC)

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"No. Truly, until just now the thought didn't even occur to me."

He's had other, worse things on his mind!

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So you didn't tell him anything but he'll know exactly what happened anyway.

How is that different?

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[ He's staring at the screen and yes, you get to see him scrub his face. ]

He doesn't know exactly what happened. He knows something happened. He's seen how it affects me and I'm a shit liar. If I avoided him, he'd know something happened there too. There's pretty much no way for him to not know something happened.

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ravenswrath

"Richter has his faults, but he does give me everything I ask for. If your warden says no, I can try mine," he offers, trying to be helpful.

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You're confident enough that he'll work out what happened that you're warning me he might do something about it.

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I'm confident enough that he's going to go 'the only person he won't talk about is Astarion, let me go bother Astarion' because he wants to know and I won't tell him.

He always wants to know.

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A 'yes' would have sufficed.

So your inability to tell Arthur that something is none of his business outweighs a promise you made to me. Understood.

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I told him it's none of his business. I told him not to get involved. I told him you and I working together has to be none of his business.

But I can't control him. He does what he wants.

Edited Date: 2024-05-26 07:05 pm (UTC)

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My problem isn't that you can't control him, it's that you won't control yourself.

You knew I'd used a weapon and you knew where. You could have just asked me what happened to them. 'Oh, but you lied to me about something insignificant, so I can't trust you'. Fine. I would be much less annoyed if you'd asked me and then gone groping corpses in the gutter to confirm my story, an idea which occurred even to me despite being a moron.

Go fuck yourself.

[ disconnecting 😔 ]

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[ John just disconnects.

And then he's going to breathe in deep and breath out slow and put his communicator down and walk for a minute. ]

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"I may take you up on that," Astarion says, then pauses, thoughtful. "How long have you been assigned to him?"

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ravenswrath

He thinks back. "Two floods and a breach ago," he finally decides.

"Not everyone counts time the same."

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Astarion nods, sanguine.

"What does he consider to be 'wardening'?"

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ravenswrath

Corvo hums a little as he considers.

"We haven't discussed it. He hasn't read my file and I don't think he intends to. He tries to catch me in inconsistencies, challenge what I'm thinking. But I believe he trusts I won't harm anyone unless they deserve it, so he gives me a long leash."

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[And in practice - the part that no warden she's encountered seems fully capable of understanding the threat of - it could all be taken away again at a word, with nothing functional Astarion or anyone on his behalf could do about it.]

Would you say? If he did harm you?

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To you, because of this? Yes. I would.

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At all. Because he could.

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Yes. Though I...don't think he's going to.

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If I've learned anything about people who will accept power over other people, it's that even when they're good, even if they don't mean to, sometimes they do damage.

And sometimes we're willing to endure that damage for whatever reason, but I feel like - I worry that you're someone who's so used to just taking it that you've forgotten that you don't have to.

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[Astarion takes this extremely good read on his perspective plus the phrase 'I worry' slightly better than you might expect, which is to say that he just sits quietly with it all for a while instead of immediately laughing it off.]

...I...

...I know I don't have to take it. But this place makes it very easy to expect it.

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[She doesn't think he does know that, not really. She knows because she feels the same way.

But it's easier to stand up for someone else than oneself, isn't it?]

I know. It's part of what I hate about it, and what I hate about people who refuse to even acknowledge that.

But we don't have to be of this place.

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