She notices. Of course she does. She also abruptly realizes she didn't exactly mean to put herself into a place to have to answer this particular question honestly.
"Because nothing has so far, for me," she finally settles on - and she does look up when she says, "And I've tried. I've tried a lot, both before and after."
"And so the greatest temptation is to stop trying," Astarion agrees, with a
sigh. "But I - certainly for myself, I can't. I can't just lie down and
stop."
"I'd made up my mind to do exactly that," she admits. "When I got here I didn't want any more friends, any more projects or goals or anything at all - I didn't want to keep going. But you all had to fucking ruin that."
"Yes, well. I didn't want to feel the faintest trace of affection or
commitment towards anybody," Astarion drawls. "I had every intention of
being a beautiful undead monolith. Yet here we are. Dreadful, isn't it?"
"I - hm. 'Food' is a rather broad category," he says dryly. "It's rather
like jumping from complete illiteracy to choosing a single book from the
library. Perhaps - something you enjoy? As a place to start."
"I just wanted to make sure there wasn't anything you'd seen in passing, or heard someone else talk about."
She smirks.
"I kind of already shoved most of my favorites at you. But we can try them actually warm this time, and I'll probably be better at making them a second time around."
"There's no precise translation," Astarion says, lightly batting at her fingers with his own. "The closest would be - 'sweetheart', perhaps. It's used between partners, or parents and children."
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2025-01-07 04:31 pm (UTC)"Because nothing has so far, for me," she finally settles on - and she does look up when she says, "And I've tried. I've tried a lot, both before and after."
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Date: 2025-01-07 04:34 pm (UTC)"And so the greatest temptation is to stop trying," Astarion agrees, with a sigh. "But I - certainly for myself, I can't. I can't just lie down and stop."
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Date: 2025-01-07 04:36 pm (UTC)It's a fond exasperation.
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Date: 2025-01-07 04:39 pm (UTC)"Yes, well. I didn't want to feel the faintest trace of affection or commitment towards anybody," Astarion drawls. "I had every intention of being a beautiful undead monolith. Yet here we are. Dreadful, isn't it?"
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Date: 2025-01-07 06:18 pm (UTC)"I'm glad you're not," she offers. "But I'm also a little sorry. It's... harder."
Feeling affection. Feeling commitment.
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Date: 2025-01-07 07:00 pm (UTC)"It's terrifying, actually." Astarion laughs. "But I...if I could choose to stop feeling this way, I wouldn't."
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Date: 2025-01-07 07:17 pm (UTC)"We were friends first, querido," she reminds him. "If I can ever - if you ever need. I'm not afraid of you, or anything you could need to talk out."
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Date: 2025-01-07 07:42 pm (UTC)"...thank you."
He leans over to have a proper look at her patch job.
"A strong first attempt, darling."
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Date: 2025-01-08 11:40 am (UTC)And then she circles back: "Maybe we should start small. What would you like for dinner?"
Now that he can choose.
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Date: 2025-01-08 11:56 am (UTC)Astarion blinks at her.
"I, ah - the only thing I'm actually hungry for hasn't changed," he says delicately. "Food is more of a...curiosity."
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Date: 2025-01-08 11:59 am (UTC)"But what are you curious to try? I have an in with the kitchen."
It's her. She's the in.
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Date: 2025-01-08 12:04 pm (UTC)"I - hm. 'Food' is a rather broad category," he says dryly. "It's rather like jumping from complete illiteracy to choosing a single book from the library. Perhaps - something you enjoy? As a place to start."
no subject
Date: 2025-01-08 12:08 pm (UTC)She smirks.
"I kind of already shoved most of my favorites at you. But we can try them actually warm this time, and I'll probably be better at making them a second time around."
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Date: 2025-01-08 12:20 pm (UTC)"All right. I did like the things you gave me, though I know my tolerance for spice may be a work in progress," he admits.
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Date: 2025-01-08 12:24 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2025-01-08 12:28 pm (UTC)"Treat me like a what? I need to learn this other language," Astarion murmurs.
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Date: 2025-01-08 12:31 pm (UTC)"My mother's language. But you wouldn't really get that one, probably, even if I explained. Just know I mean it fondly."
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Date: 2025-01-08 12:40 pm (UTC)"You're calling me a child or a foreigner or a coward or somesuch, aren't you?" Astarion rolls his eyes, but he's smiling. "I'll allow it."
no subject
Date: 2025-01-08 12:46 pm (UTC)"And I think it'd serve you right, since you won't tell me what damia means."
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Date: 2025-01-08 12:49 pm (UTC)"There's no precise translation," Astarion says, lightly batting at her fingers with his own. "The closest would be - 'sweetheart', perhaps. It's used between partners, or parents and children."
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Date: 2025-01-08 12:55 pm (UTC)"Pale. White."
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Date: 2025-01-08 01:09 pm (UTC)"Well, I shan't be defending myself against any of those accusations any time soon," Astarion concedes. "I can live with that."
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Date: 2025-01-08 01:12 pm (UTC)Astarion hasn't been privy to a good, solid Spanish cussing out, though she expects there's some Faerun equivalent.
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Date: 2025-01-08 01:16 pm (UTC)"So you can defend my virtue?" He laughs, but he's honestly charmed. "Very well."
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Date: 2025-01-08 01:17 pm (UTC)He doesn't need her to defend him, but it's not nothing to know one isn't alone.
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