She wasn't trying to hide it, necessarily. It's just difficult to explain, possibly moreso because of who she's trying to explain it to, not the least because of timing.
An element of that is pure selfishness on his part, combined with extremely
superficial social skills. His friendships on the Barge are the longest
relationships he's ever voluntarily had, at least that he can remember. But
he's also not unaware that he'd be pressing on scar tissue.
"Would you like to talk about it? Or - perhaps like is the wrong word. Do
you want me to know?"
The truth is, Rosita isn't interested in being a social experiment, and she isn't interested in being poked at for some stranger's satisfaction. She would not have entertained this conversation for anything other than a defense mechanism when they first met.
But she and Astarion are closer now. They're more to each other, she hopes, now.
"Well - the relevant part of it... is that the virus itself was making things worse for weeks. For months. But the world I came from is kind of like the one we just left, just not as advanced: most people kind of never expected that anything too bad would happen. Most people didn't think there was much that could completely disrupt their way of life. And when we hit that tipping point, it went fast."
"They thought it would just blow over, and then it didn't," Astarion
murmurs.
That doesn't feel enormously naive on her society's part. Even in Faerun,
the greatest existential threats eventually give way to the status quo,
even if day to day life has changed a little to adjust.
She nods. It feels naive now, but hindsight, all that.
"I... still don't really know what happened, you know? In the space of a few weeks, communication failed, government broke down, supply chains just... stopped. Supermarkets were empty and most of us had no idea how to make our own food. Those with weapons started taking from those who didn't, and law enforcement and the military had no orders so they were just doing whatever the highest ranking among them thought was best. Shooting rioters, disposing of entire wards of infected, hoarding supplies -"
She shrugs, sounding detached now, because she doesn't want to dig into it too deeply.
"In a last ditch effort to control the spread of the virus, military planes dropped bombs on... well I'm assuming a lot of major cities, but mostly I just know about mine, don't I?" It was chaos, with no clear direction, every person for themselves for the most part and she shivers faintly.
"But the hardest part now. The hardest part to keep living with. Was just suddenly everyone I ever knew being gone. I couldn't call my cousin in the next city over, or text my friends from work. There was no electricity, no internet. And that's just... if they weren't outright dead, which I'm sure they all are now, but I'll never know what happened. They're just gone." She looks up. "And every time we come back from a breach, it happens again. All at once, people I thought I'd grow old with. Just gone."
Astarion straightens up slightly. Aylin mews at him.
"I..."
It had never occurred to him, really. His own world is less connected - it's not unrealistic to make a friend for a week as they pass through your city and then never see or hear from them again - but written correspondence still exists. The infrastructure is there. Magic helps to some degree, though that kind of magic is costly and limited.
It's an additional cruelty of her world and its apocalypse that he hasn't thought on much. And the thought of having to face that at the end of every breach-
"I didn't think I'd have more reasons to want to push the Admiral into a furnace, and yet here we are," he says. "Hells."
It sounds saccharine and useless, but in a place where sometimes people aren't themselves, she means it at its most basic. And she is someone who values her time to just be with her people.
"Would you mind if I stayed a while? If you're still tired, we don't have to do anything. I can carve or something."
"I actually like them, but don't tell Jacob," she chuckles, dropping the napkin onto the tray.
"I learn things." And as she's just explained a bit more to him, she's in a position back home where she needs to know things like how to fish. "You'd look good with a beard, though."
"Alas, I couldn't grow one if I wanted to," Astarion sighs, and carefully
displaces Aylin so he can get up and grab the Criterion Collection DVDs
John gave him. "Body hair in general. That's an elven thing, not an undead
thing."
Halsin is an exception, but Astarion suspects there's something broad and
hairy in his ancestry.
"I'll do my best to keep up," Astarion says, setting the other DVD case
back onto the shelf. He goes to retrieve the tablet he plays them on.
"Shall we share the bed?"
He's still sore, honestly, and lying down has appeal.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2025-02-05 08:42 pm (UTC)She, too, is an asshole after all.
no subject
Date: 2025-02-05 08:44 pm (UTC)"We're not."
He's silent for a while.
"Did - anything happen to you in the breach I ought to know about?"
no subject
Date: 2025-02-05 08:55 pm (UTC)It would be so easy to just say no. She probably should, given the thorn patch they're already in.
"Nothing bad happened to me in the breach." She has a napkin in her hands now, and she folds it into smaller and smaller pieces.
no subject
Date: 2025-02-05 08:59 pm (UTC)Well, he's not that stupid.
"So what did happen?"
no subject
Date: 2025-02-05 09:05 pm (UTC)"I was married." A beat. "To Jacob."
no subject
Date: 2025-02-05 09:12 pm (UTC)"Ah."
Astarion chews on that for a few moments.
"I'm not sure if it would have been more or less awkward if it had been someone you weren't already involved with."
no subject
Date: 2025-02-05 09:14 pm (UTC)There's certainly some awkwardness that stems from it, to be fair, but overall her problem is always... a little more specific.
"We haven't talked a lot about what happened in my world. The virus, and how that... changed everything, forever."
no subject
Date: 2025-02-05 09:20 pm (UTC)"No, we haven't."
An element of that is pure selfishness on his part, combined with extremely superficial social skills. His friendships on the Barge are the longest relationships he's ever voluntarily had, at least that he can remember. But he's also not unaware that he'd be pressing on scar tissue.
"Would you like to talk about it? Or - perhaps like is the wrong word. Do you want me to know?"
no subject
Date: 2025-02-05 09:24 pm (UTC)But she and Astarion are closer now. They're more to each other, she hopes, now.
"Well - the relevant part of it... is that the virus itself was making things worse for weeks. For months. But the world I came from is kind of like the one we just left, just not as advanced: most people kind of never expected that anything too bad would happen. Most people didn't think there was much that could completely disrupt their way of life. And when we hit that tipping point, it went fast."
no subject
Date: 2025-02-05 09:37 pm (UTC)"They thought it would just blow over, and then it didn't," Astarion murmurs.
That doesn't feel enormously naive on her society's part. Even in Faerun, the greatest existential threats eventually give way to the status quo, even if day to day life has changed a little to adjust.
"Go on?"
no subject
Date: 2025-02-05 09:46 pm (UTC)"I... still don't really know what happened, you know? In the space of a few weeks, communication failed, government broke down, supply chains just... stopped. Supermarkets were empty and most of us had no idea how to make our own food. Those with weapons started taking from those who didn't, and law enforcement and the military had no orders so they were just doing whatever the highest ranking among them thought was best. Shooting rioters, disposing of entire wards of infected, hoarding supplies -"
She shrugs, sounding detached now, because she doesn't want to dig into it too deeply.
"In a last ditch effort to control the spread of the virus, military planes dropped bombs on... well I'm assuming a lot of major cities, but mostly I just know about mine, don't I?" It was chaos, with no clear direction, every person for themselves for the most part and she shivers faintly.
"But the hardest part now. The hardest part to keep living with. Was just suddenly everyone I ever knew being gone. I couldn't call my cousin in the next city over, or text my friends from work. There was no electricity, no internet. And that's just... if they weren't outright dead, which I'm sure they all are now, but I'll never know what happened. They're just gone." She looks up. "And every time we come back from a breach, it happens again. All at once, people I thought I'd grow old with. Just gone."
no subject
Date: 2025-02-05 10:02 pm (UTC)Astarion straightens up slightly. Aylin mews at him.
"I..."
It had never occurred to him, really. His own world is less connected - it's not unrealistic to make a friend for a week as they pass through your city and then never see or hear from them again - but written correspondence still exists. The infrastructure is there. Magic helps to some degree, though that kind of magic is costly and limited.
It's an additional cruelty of her world and its apocalypse that he hasn't thought on much. And the thought of having to face that at the end of every breach-
"I didn't think I'd have more reasons to want to push the Admiral into a furnace, and yet here we are," he says. "Hells."
no subject
Date: 2025-02-05 10:14 pm (UTC)"It's harder when I was happy in them." She shrugs again, trying desperately to make it not matter.
"So no, nothing bad happened. But now I get to figure out what to do with all of this here, and now Jacob is tangled up in it."
no subject
Date: 2025-02-05 10:21 pm (UTC)"Well, we've established that I'm terrible at solving problems," Astarion says. "Is there - anything I can do?"
no subject
Date: 2025-02-05 10:26 pm (UTC)It sounds saccharine and useless, but in a place where sometimes people aren't themselves, she means it at its most basic. And she is someone who values her time to just be with her people.
"Would you mind if I stayed a while? If you're still tired, we don't have to do anything. I can carve or something."
no subject
Date: 2025-02-05 10:31 pm (UTC)"Of course you can stay," Astarion says. "I'm not going to be available for anything strenuous, but we could watch a film, perhaps?"
A distraction might be useful? He's not sure.
no subject
Date: 2025-02-05 10:35 pm (UTC)"Are you going to make me watch a fishing documentary?"
no subject
Date: 2025-02-05 10:58 pm (UTC)"Just as soon as I've grown a beard, darling," Astarion laughs. "No, a real film with actors and few if any fish, I promise."
no subject
Date: 2025-02-05 11:10 pm (UTC)"I learn things." And as she's just explained a bit more to him, she's in a position back home where she needs to know things like how to fish. "You'd look good with a beard, though."
no subject
Date: 2025-02-05 11:14 pm (UTC)"Alas, I couldn't grow one if I wanted to," Astarion sighs, and carefully displaces Aylin so he can get up and grab the Criterion Collection DVDs John gave him. "Body hair in general. That's an elven thing, not an undead thing."
Halsin is an exception, but Astarion suspects there's something broad and hairy in his ancestry.
no subject
Date: 2025-02-05 11:22 pm (UTC)But that's all she's going to say about that, pushing up to follow him.
"Pick anything that's not horror."
no subject
Date: 2025-02-05 11:41 pm (UTC)Astarion just hums a concession and rummages through the discs, eventually holding up two.
"I haven't watched either of these yet, they don't...look horrifying."
'These' are The Breakfast Club and Thelma and Louise.
no subject
Date: 2025-02-06 12:05 am (UTC)"Breakfast Club, every time. Although it's high school stereotypes, so I suspect I'll be doing a lot of explaining."
no subject
Date: 2025-02-06 12:09 am (UTC)"I'll do my best to keep up," Astarion says, setting the other DVD case back onto the shelf. He goes to retrieve the tablet he plays them on. "Shall we share the bed?"
He's still sore, honestly, and lying down has appeal.
no subject
Date: 2025-02-06 12:19 am (UTC)Jacob did tell her that he hadn't wanted to be touched last night, after all.
"Could I interest you in another massage?"
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